I've sometimes wondered if I'm a sex addict. I never say no to it. The woman could be younger, older, married, have a boyfriend, or single. It doesn't matter. My moral compass broke years ago so if sex is offered, I always say yes. I've figured all this time it was because I never knew if I would get the opportunity with that particular woman again so why not? I always take advantage of my situation. After all, should sex ever be turned down? I say no. Besides, I really enjoy sex; everything about it.
As time has gone on, though, I've thought my enjoyment for sex has turned into a need for it. Not for love, mind you; just sex. The raw emotion of it. The control. The ego nourishment. I think that's what I now constantly need instead of actual sex. The sex is just my way to obtain all of that, I guess.
Honestly, if I am addicted to sex, I'm ok with that. There are worse things to be addicted to. It's my only main vice. Well, that and a pretty decent blackjack game.
As time has gone on, though, I've thought my enjoyment for sex has turned into a need for it. Not for love, mind you; just sex. The raw emotion of it. The control. The ego nourishment. I think that's what I now constantly need instead of actual sex. The sex is just my way to obtain all of that, I guess.
Honestly, if I am addicted to sex, I'm ok with that. There are worse things to be addicted to. It's my only main vice. Well, that and a pretty decent blackjack game.
1 comment:
I can understand where you're coming from with this post Mr AEC. I too have felt the same. For almost 6 years. It came so late in life, but I enjoyed it all...the sex, the risks, the different men. Then one day I realised I couldn't do it any more. As if a barrier dropped, my head battled with my hormones. An uncomfortable and emotionally draining time. But I'm OK with that now.
Good to see you posting again. One day very soon I will be doing the same, but it will not be in the same vein as it was before.
Leah
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